I believe tragedy shows us who we are, at our core.
In my twenties I often wondered how I would have responded in WWII if I were in Germany and not Jewish. Would I have turned in Jews? Would I have punished others? Would I have helped Jews, risking my life and those I love—to be humane in a time of hatred? Would I have stood by silently, hoping to get through unharmed–trying not to feel the enormity of lives lost? I don’t know.
One sunny afternoon, when I was in college, a group of my friends and I were sitting in a loose circle on the floor of a dorm room, talking about whatever was on our minds at the time. I looked around the circle, wondering why we all choose to be friends.
It hit me—we had all suffered a trauma of some sort. Each of us. Yet here we were, winding our way through a very demanding college, making friends, having fun, thriving.
Being the overly-philosophical one of the group, I asked my friends what they thought—were our traumas what brought us together?
It was not our trauma, we decided—it was our strength.
We all had a sureness, a solidness, we each unconsciously recognized. It drew us to each other. Don’t mistake me—we (or at least I) all had our own brand of insecurity, suffering, and angst. But we felt strength below that.
We are in a time of mass trauma. Listening to the news yesterday morning. I almost sank to my knees, as further realization of the devastation sank in.
I wondered how I was going to handle all the pain I was feeling.
Then it hit me—I’ve been in training for this most of my life. I’ve been through tragedy and survived. I’ve felt immense pain and moved through, and past it.
I love reading fantasy novels, books with other worlds, magic, villains, and very flawed heroes and heroines. The characters dig deep, find their strength, and save themselves and others as a result.
Sadly, what we are living through with COVID-19 is not fantasy. The entire world is experiencing the very real struggles, uncertainty, and fears too many face all their lives.
Many of us have already been tested, and though we still struggle, we know our strength. We will make it through, stronger, even if the end result is death.
This is a time for us to dig deep and remember—or discover—our strength, our resilience, our human need to connect, love, and care.
Some will be too scared and will shut down, closing in on themselves to ward off the knowledge of what is happening. Give them your compassion.
Find loved ones in your life, or authors, speakers, and leaders who inspire you. Spend time with their words, wisdom, and strength.
Do you ever feel more stressed than is comfortable? Are you, like me, on the search for tools to help reduce stress?
If you answered no to those questions, please contact me, I really, really want to know what you know! I just finished my book and am in the process of expanding my business, so I have been using stress-reduction tools a LOT!
During times of high stress, I constantly use the gazillion stress-reduction techniques I have learned. They never totally make the stress go away, but they enable me to be calmer as I am pursuing whatever goal, task, or risk I am facing. They help me breathe a little deeper, relax a little more, and have a quieter mind.
I recently had coffee with a colleague I’ve known since college, Nancy Linnerooth. Nancy uses EFT/Tapping to help her coaching clients reduce stress and overcome procrastination. She attended Harvard Law School and practiced therapy for over 17 years, so she knows how to deal with stress! If you want to know more about her work, read about her below the video and check out her website: UnblockResults.com.
I asked if she would send me a video of one of her favorite stress-reduction tools so I could share it with you. Buddha Hands is the technique she sent. It is a simple, non-obvious way to calm your nervous system in any situation.
As I was doing it, I noticed my body relaxing and I spontaneously took a deep breath—signs that my nervous system was relaxing. This tool works! I highly recommend you watch it and practice Buddha Hands as you are watching.